Inexplicable German-ness
Why, God, Why??
The Second Frost happened last night.(1) As before, the clouds burned off by 9.00, leaving a cloudless, brilliant air and a bright, nearly blinding sun. But it's still cold as shit. I know I'm not supposed to be griping about the weather, but my gloves are kaputt, and I was forced to ride my bike to school, due to my lazing about in bed this morning. Here's the equation:
Freezing Cold + Metal Bicycle + Lack of Protective Clothing = Human Sterilization
It is now 11.19, and my outside thermometer says it is 3ºC, which means it's either 0ºC or 6ºC. Either way, I'm glad that my apartment has in-floor heating.
Don't Try This at Your House, Kids -- Go to a Neighbor's, Instead
More things that are very German, yet inexplicable:
--------Endnotes--------
1. The First Frost being the night before Thanksgiving.
2. Money would be quickly followed by time, film, and the food that I inevitably throw at the TV in disgust.
3. What erases memory? Alcohol! Luckily, beer is easily acquired in this country.
4. That's "Bayern Eins Radio."
The Second Frost happened last night.(1) As before, the clouds burned off by 9.00, leaving a cloudless, brilliant air and a bright, nearly blinding sun. But it's still cold as shit. I know I'm not supposed to be griping about the weather, but my gloves are kaputt, and I was forced to ride my bike to school, due to my lazing about in bed this morning. Here's the equation:
Freezing Cold + Metal Bicycle + Lack of Protective Clothing = Human Sterilization
It is now 11.19, and my outside thermometer says it is 3ºC, which means it's either 0ºC or 6ºC. Either way, I'm glad that my apartment has in-floor heating.
Don't Try This at Your House, Kids -- Go to a Neighbor's, Instead
More things that are very German, yet inexplicable:
- Bob Ross
OK. He's not German, but they love him over here. Why? I don't know! I'll give prizes to anyone who can give me a reasonable explanation for this. His television show is broadcast here untranslated, which is something. He's name seems to be used, at least among university students, as short-hand for American drug use tendencies. - Volksmusik
This stuff...should be...banned? shot? At least, Germany, please refrain from making more music videos of this crap. Please! Please?
Imagine John Denver in concert, backed up by an Oom-pah Band, except the musicians can sometimes make Hair Bands seem subdued, and they are standing (with insturments) on the tops of otherwise perfectly good mountains. This is a waste of lots of things, not the first of which is money.(2) - The Following Christmas Songs
- Exhibit A: Winter Wonderland by the Eurythmics
Absolutely unacceptable. Completely uncalled for. I wish I could erase it from my memory.(3) I blame this song's airtime (on morning radio, no less!) on some late-night bender by the programming committee. My message to Antenne Bayern:
THAT WAS NOT FUNNY. DO NOT DO THAT AGAIN. - Exhibit B: The Christmas Trucking Song by ???
Also relatively frightening. Jingle Bells, except with something resembling the lyrics to (We've Got a Great Big) Convoy crudely stapled to it. There was even a children's choir backing up the chorus. Shudder.
- Exhibit A: Winter Wonderland by the Eurythmics
- Das Blaue Couch
This is a good thing! An interview snippet on Bayern1 Radio (4), in which the guest plays a short word-association game with the host. Very clever, and the answers range from purile drivel to clever punnery. It's like those obnoxious email surveys your friends send you, except with famous and/or intriguing people.
--------Endnotes--------
1. The First Frost being the night before Thanksgiving.
2. Money would be quickly followed by time, film, and the food that I inevitably throw at the TV in disgust.
3. What erases memory? Alcohol! Luckily, beer is easily acquired in this country.
4. That's "Bayern Eins Radio."
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